Recent dreams

I have a new recurring dream -- that I'm hanging out at an art fair. It's a pretty enjoyable dream. I'm having fun and looking at art and talking to people and enjoying the outdoors. But my favorite on-line dream dictionary does not have an "art fair" entry, and related entried are kind of annoying. They don't respect how much I like art, and how it makes me feel smart and joyful at the same time.

Quotes are from dreammoods.com
"Art Gallery
To dream that you are in an art gallery, signifies disappointing reunions. You struggle to put forth a happy appearance, but in the inside, you yearn to be somewhere else."

This is kind of how I feel about my job lately. The election season is leaving me in a daydream wherein I quit my job and get a low paying but meaningful job helping people get health insurance.

"Joy
To dream that you are joyful, denotes harmony amongst friends and loved ones. "

My first paragraph above made me think to look up this word. This makes a lot of sense. I recently dumped my very last shitty friend, and now all my friends are wonderful and fun and get along with each other.

The entry for artists only talks about if you are the artist, and in this dream I'm the consumer of art, not the creator. Of course, from an economic standpoint, by buying art, I am assisting in its creation. This summer I went to the big art fair in Minneapolis, and I bought a real piece of art, and it felt like one of the most important things I'd done with $100 in a really, really long time. I purchased a piece of pure beauty for my own enjoyment, and put some money in the pocket of a very talented potter.

From "artist", "The picture that you are painting in your dream may symbolize the way that you are visualizing your current situation in your waking life. "

Fun, beauty, all five senses... surrounded by people whose motivations I relate to? Yes, that is how I visualize my personal life lately.

"Fair
To dream that you are at the fair, suggests that you may be regressing into your childhood where times were simpler."

This bugs me because it sounds bad, but since I actually spent my childhood being overly responsible, maybe a little regression is a good thing.

"Music
To hear harmonious and soothing music in your dream, is a good omen of prosperity, pleasure and the expression of your emotions in a positive way. Music serves to heal the soul. "

In the art fair dream I had last night, I was listening to my ipod.

This art fair dream is extra nice because for more than 10 years, at least 3 times a week I dream I'm living in a big house full of furniture and rooms and people of all varieties, and they last for hours. The relationships with the people always feel longstanding but not particularly close. The rooms and furniture are often very detailed and memorable. Sometimes the houses repeat. Sometimes the rooms repeat. I never go outside or look out a window or really do anything. They're not unpleasant, it just felt like I must be stuck in a rut to be having such similar dreams all the time. The art fair dreams are more varied. Last night ipods were being sold with the art. Last week, the fair was actually in an artists colony in a postapocalypse type setting, and I spent hours wandering towards the art fair, and then hours wandering back home. Yeah for my subconscious.

This week I've also dreamt a few times that I was on a date with an African-American man, and he finally tells me that he plans to vote for John McCain, and I feel this deep sorrowful sadness for the world and our common future. Each time he is a different type of guy, too -- young, old, educated, not educated. The irony of Obama not being guaranteed to win black voters, plus my stomach wrenching anxiety over the thought of being taxed on my health benefits... are the inspirations for this dream. Everybody has the right to vote for whomever they wish.

Addiction Miracles

My mom has encouraged me not to get hooked on coffee. My mom has never mocked me harder for anything than not owning a coffee pot. She used to actually say it was bad manners and it made her feel completely ill at ease to spend any time at my house. This regrettable conversation occurred many years ago, before it became socially acceptable to rely on coffee shops for your coffee. Nowadays when coffee-loving people are on their way to my house I just stop somewhere and get the little cardboard cup holder with all their favorite drinks in it, and everybody is grateful I didn't try to make it myself. And over the years my mom has just developed the habit of a. not coming to my house before noon, and b. using a visit to my house as an opportunity to prove she can go a few hours without coffee.

I am a coffee drinker in that I LOVE good coffee and I'm quite snobbish when it comes to what coffee I will actually drink. But I've never been able to tolerate it on a regular basis. The caffeine fries my nerves and I turn into a hyperventilating vomiting mess. But lately...

Lately I can drink decaf TWICE a week -- whoo hoo! AND tea in between. I am trying to not get hooked on caffeine. I'm like still trying to sleep instead, and just use caffeine when the sleep just didn't happen. But you know, I LOVE coffee so there is a bit of a conflict of interest.

So me and my mom were eating pancakes and I whined that I wanted coffee and I thought to myself it's been a long time since we argued about coffee, and now that we're 30 and 50 instead of 20 and 40, I thought it was a good time to ask... "so should I just let myself get hooked, or should I try to avoid that? what do you really think?" And she spoke, in a dead serious way, which she rarely does, "no, don't get hooked. you know I drink it even when it's not good. I like the way it tastes, but I keep drinking it even when I'm sick from already having drank too much."

My own mother advising against coffee makes it seem like anything is possible.